i should say happy diwali in advance to everyone, seeing as i will be away this weekend, in canberra, performing with hello kitty. so, happy diwali! last weekend, i did something i haven't done in ages - went to the diwali function at the hungarian hall. seeing as i'm nearly finished writing the novel, i thought i'd soak up some good, old fashioned indian vibe before i send it off to my editor. so, i pulled out the old faithful salwaar kameez (black one with tiny pearl beading all down the front), teamed it with a cream shawl, my fake indian necklace, a red bindi and my pointy-toed ankle boots, and i was ready. mark didn't want to dress too indian, so i got him to wear his cream kurta with his jeans - i must admit he looked pretty spunky, a la a young imran khan. broody cross-cultural hunk... i likey! anyway, i grabbed my notebook & pen and off we went. the night started off okay - the food was great (i had rourou, fried potatoes, cooked tomato chutney, salad and raita - yum), and they had fresh jalebi for desert... heaven. anyway, then the speeches started. and oh my god... talk about mood killer. they make everything sound like a lecture, and they love the sound of their own voices. the program hadn't even started yet, and everyone was already bored shitless. and i don't undertsand why they insist on talking in shudh hindi when none of us actually speak like that at home... the whole thing is one big excercise in denial. anyway, we stayed over at mum and dad's house and i decided that on sunday, we'd go shopping at indian central (foster st, dandenong) before coming home. well, i must say the cust service was a lot better than the last time i remember it - people were actually friendly. there was this one guy who cracked me up, though... luckily for him i wasn't having a delicate bad-body-image day. i asked him about an outfit and he said, matter-of-factly - 'no, that one is not for you...' (directs my attention away from beautiful outfit i had asked about, toward loose, dowdy outfit that is not half as impressive, but obviously at least double the size of my original choice) '... this one is for you'. after we left the store, mark and i laughed our heads off. also overheard in another shop - an old indian woman haggling over some bangles -
woman says 'how much is this?'
shopkeeper man says 'fifteen dollars each.'
woman says 'why fifteen dollars?"
shopkeeper man says 'because it is fifteen dollars.'
woman says 'arreh baba, but why fifteen dollars?'
shopkeeper man, trying not to get angry, says 'because this is my shop, and i put the price there, i know how much everything is, and i say this bangles cost fifteen dollars.'
(woman explodes in a tirade of what i think was punjabi or gujerati insults and leaves the shop).