once, in a moment of desperation when bookstore browsing in sydney, i bought a book called '1,818 ways to write better and get published'. there was a checklist of common misconceptions of writers, writing and publishers/editors in there. books like that help, but it's just so much better when someone who's been there before decides to share their experiences. that's one of the best things that's come of this whole getting a contract thing - obviously, the getting published bit is quite amazing also - though that won't be 'real' for me for quite a while yet. fact of the matter is that the book will most probably be out next year some time - late next year. publication takes 9 months from when the manuscript is finalised. it kinda shits me when i have to explain this to people - which is one of the reasons i haven't been telling a lot of people. i watch their excitement turn to slight disappointment as they frown and go 'oh! next year?!' i should deadpan and say 'yeah, unfortunately it'll take me that long to get the cash together to pay them to publish me'. i feel like saying, 'look, can we just cut to that part where you say 'oh wow!' and leave it at that? cause when you look doubtful, i start to think i made the whole thing up, and have a blinding urge to throw myself infront of a tram'. or something. the funniest reactions i have gotten so far have been from some of 'the indians'. when chatting, if i say something like 'i have some news', they clutch at my arm, and gape excitedly from my belly, to mark, to my belly again. then i say 'no, i'm not pregnant, that's just my beer gut, i'm actually getting published', they go 'oh' and get all disappointed. it used to really shit me that some of them just didn;t seem to get how much of a big deal this is to me - but it actually amuses me now... ah, well.
to lighten the mood, here is an extract from '1,818 ways to write better and get published'.
- some common misconceptions about writers and writing -
- a writer must suffer
- writers must reach deep into their souls when they write
- writers are cerebral, intellectual people - probably even eggheads
- writing is a noble act
- writers are wise
- writers are unhappy
- you must bare your soul in everything you write
- you must be completely free of distraction and interruption to write well
- the only good reason to write is to make money
- making money is not a good reason to write
- all writers are a little bit (or more than a little bit) crazy